Da Duhty Jurz

If you cannot pronounce/figure out the title, this post is probably not for you.

If you can, then YES. I'm talkin about the new MTV show: Jersey Shore. This show fulfills every stereotype that I have EVER had about new jurz. or juhz. or however they say it. I've only seen bits and pieces of 2 episodes, but i know enough already to get the gist of how every show will be. essentially, there is not a plot, because it's unnecessary. their lives are interesting enough as is.

let's take a trip into the house with the Italian flag flapping lazily in the breeze. "Oh no", says Marf, "it's painted on the outside of the house. Even better." agreed.

first things first. their names. JWOWW. The Situation. Snooki (not to be confused with the ghetto name ...and also the name of my teddy bear...."pooki"). what would my name be? shaunbomb. true story: this was actually an exclusive nickname between me and another guy in highschool who called himself the "tombomb." i coulda .01% maybe survived in da jurz! have you ever asked yourself...what would your jersey name be? apparently, there are links that will answer the question FOR you. google it.

secondly, i happened to be the lucky viewer of the epi where the "houseguests" hit up the jacuzzi. i believe one houseguest jurz gurl told anotha featured jurz girl "stop pretendin to be someone else. at least we are really being real." dont quote me, but it was along those lines. then, 2 girls proceeded to make out with 1 guy. over and over. circulating guys. i can't believe the fake, featured jerz girls who didnt want to do this on camera! cmonnnn! this is expected of you! dont be too haughty taughty for the hot tub makeouts!

thirdly, why are there so many Christian crosses on the hairgelled (sp?) guys? im not sure i want the cross on these hooligans. just sayin. wait! hold the phone! Angelina left! now they are saying grace .."bless all the roomies that are still here," says Snooki. aww..sincerity is truly to be valued. Salud!

ok lastly (for NOW)...can you all understand everything they say? i canNOT. worse than southern accents. oml no. i cannot stop now. i just saw a preview for aNOTHER jacuzzi scene. another MO sesh. but...between all da juhz gurls? no surprises here. anytime i watch this show, i will fail to be surprised. nothing will surprise me. snooki and ryder makin out. with snooki holding some champagne. up!, she's MO'in with Mike now. Mike: This is gettin wild right now. watch the show for the following comments.

comment: "...like...sorry, mom."

ahh such a waste of time that im spending. "and im enjoying it" (Marf.)

alrighty, well 9 more minutes. I could probably write an hour (or more) longer based on forthcoming material. (expect a second post) however, i am not gonna waste more of your time as well. it's already been minutely wasted.

salud.

*disclaimer: I have tons of New Jersey friends. But they are from "New Jersey." Not da juhz. there is a difference in my mind. New Jersey people are legit and entertaining in acceptable ways.